A friend of mine posted on Facebook one of the best articles describing introversion, 15 Things That Introverts Will Never Tell You. I loved it! It described me just about perfectly.
What are these 15 things? Here you go:
1. Small talk sucks.
2. Being alone is fine.
3. We aren't rude or uptight.
4. Sometimes, we swing both ways (not like that! Pervert)
5. We have friends. And they like us! Probably.
6. When with the right people, we feel safe.
7. We like to write things out.
8. We're super productive.
9. If we don't like you, you won't know it.
10. Networking events suck.
11. We don't like crowds.
12. Sorry, we probably weren't listening to your story.
13. Don't make a fuss out of our birthdays.
14. We don't want to make a fuss out of your birthday.
15. If we've chosen to be friends with you, appreciate it.
At first glance, some of these sounds downright snotty, but they aren't meant to be that way. Here's the deal:
We look at the big picture, at meaningful things, and think deeply...small talk is uncomfortable for us. That's often why we HATE THE PHONE. I rarely answer mine because unless it's for something quick and important, I dread it. I don't do small talk. My mind will wander (#12) and I'll get off the phone as quickly as possible. The same is true in person sometimes. I'm totally cool with silence while hanging out.
This is where #7 comes in. Email and texting are a Godsend to us. I can be the wordiest person ever through these channels. And also take this blog....I'm a total open book on here but ask me about some of these things in person and I might not be nearly as forthcoming.
I have a really hard time with crowds, part of the reason why I rarely see my husband play during his downtown Austin band gigs. The thought of being around a lot of drunk people in a busy bar is about the last thing I want to do, but I have gone to see him a couple times and enjoyed myself....luckily those times it wasn't too busy. I make exceptions for things like concerts, but I hightail it out of there as soon as the concert is over. If I have to weave my way through a crowd for a long period of time, I'm exhausted by the time I get to my car.
And birthdays....oh birthdays. A nice dinner and a cake and I'm good. I just don't think birthdays are a huge deal and I don't need to celebrate every single one.
I'm nice to just about everyone, even if I don't like that person. Confrontation makes me incredibly uncomfortable (#9), and it's just not worth the effort most of the time. So I often just stay silent. If I don't like you, I don't need to spend any kind of energy on you. That's exhausts me and then I need to be alone to recharge.
Speaking of being alone....it's sort of my favorite thing (#2). A quiet house, no TV on, me and the dogs, a project or a book in front of me. I'm totally thrilled and happy and relaxed and it's awesome. Seriously. I just don't need social stimulation every day. As a matter of fact, when my calendar is full I hate it.
Now, if you get me around the right people, I am lively. I am loud. And I have fun (#4-6). These are my best friends or those who I can easily identify with. You'd never know I'm an introvert in those situations. My closest circle of friends make me incredibly happy and I love them dearly.
This is me. It's frustrating sometimes, but I'm not about to change and there are lots of others out there just like me.
Does this resonate with you, too?