Monday, December 14, 2015

The love of a dog

On November 15, 2002, a wonderful ball of love and joy came into our lives and we named her Phoebe.

She stole my heart from Day 1.

My children have never known a life without her. My son was only 9 months old when we got her, and my daughter wasn't born until 2005. She's been our constant and our light through all our sad times.

We lost her on December 10, 2015 at age 13.

She had been in poor health for quite awhile. She has had cancer, infections, stomach issues, and her arthritis had been getting much worse this year. On Wednesday, December 9, she could no longer get up off her back legs. She was crying as she tried. Even with a double dose of pain meds she was still unable to really move. So we made the call.

On Thursday afternoon at 3pm, I said goodbye to her.

Watching the life leave my darling dog was absolutely excruciating. My face was the last thing she saw before the sedatives put her to sleep. I didn't take my hands off of her while she fell asleep. I wanted her to feel the love and warmth until the very end. When the vet said she was gone, it felt like my heart had stopped, too.

I got a few more moments alone with her before I had to leave her. I kissed her ears (oh, how I always loved her soft ears) and her sweet face (those wrinkles!), I buried my face into her fur, and I put the blanket around her.

The next morning the weight of her absence was heavy. I have gotten so used to her sweet face being the first thing I saw every morning and I felt empty. Those soulful eyes and those sweet doggie more.

She was the most perfect dog and there will never be another one like her.

Thanks for the love and the memories, my sweet Phoebe.