Friday, August 19, 2011

So what's up with me?

I haven't blogged in almost a month. I've had ideas on what to write about but something is always getting in the way of getting it out....our schedule, writer's block, the desire to nap frequently....I guess I just haven't been feeling very inspired.

Since I resigned from our HOA board, I'd like to say that my stress level has gone down and I suppose in a few ways it has. It's nice to have that time free for other things, but I don't seem to be any less busy. We have managed to keep our schedule pretty full, and while a lot of it has been fun and great (I love my friends!!!), some things just seem like such a time-sucker.  I'd love nothing more than 5 solid days of absolutely no distractions. Doesn't everyone!? 

I think I'm going through a phase of just being very disconcerted, very disillusioned, and I guess downright depressed about things I see around me, in the news, in the world in general. It seems stupid to let a lot of little things (and I suppose some big things) just get me in the dumps, but I suppose that's what has happened.  My faith in the human race is being tested. I'm appalled at the things I see not just in the news but even around me with people I know. It's disgusting to me that there is such a level of selfishness in people that they can think of no one else but themselves, that some have no regard for how they treat others or how their actions may effect others. It just seems like so many people's priorities are put into the wrong things....whether it's material, for pleasure, and even a sense of superiority over others. I'm seeing it all and I'm disturbed.

I admit that I'm not perfect....FAR FROM IT. I have moments of wanting to be purely selfish. But it always comes back down to my priority - MY FAMILY. They come first with me. That's part of the reason that I resigned from the board. I felt like they were getting shafted with my time and I needed to put a stop to that. Plus they needed a less stressed mom and more quality time. If I need time to myself, I take it, and it makes me a better mom when I circle back to them. It's not at their detriment.

Poor Greg keeps getting an earful from me about how things and people are just pissing me off, and luckily he totally understands and often feels the same way. I need to shake this resentment, however, and get back to focusing on happy things. Getting it out on the blog seems to be a good start. Maybe writing about my feelings will be a good start to moving onto more positive feelings.

So what else is up with me?

I think I'm injured.

For a few weeks now I've felt some discomfort in my right Achilles tendon after a run.  A little bit of pain, some stiffness, a little inflexibility. I find it stiffens up when I've been immobile for a bit as well.  Sure sounds like tendonitis to me, so I'm going with that. Of course, rest is one of the things that is recommended to "cure" it, but we all know that's not really going to happen. About the only thing that would force me to rest is a fracture. I'm stubborn like that. But I do know that I need to baby the tendon if the problem is going to go away. So for right now, I'm doing yoga for increased flexibility, doing extra stretching after runs, icing about 3 times per day, taking anti-inflammatories after my runs, and praying for healing. I'm going to look into accupressure as well.

My half marathon is in 7 weeks and I want to have a good time. I want to walk away from it uninjured and ready for my next marathon in January. I need this injury to be resolved.

I've resently felt a bit discouraged about my running. I had a very tough 10 miler two weeks ago that prompted a week-long rest from running. I had a hard time keeping up my usual pace, felt overheated, ended up taking walking breaks, and was stiff and sore afterwards. I focused on stretching, core, and flexibility for that rest week and it seemed to help me both physically and mentally. I've had good runs this week, including a really great speedwork session on Monday. Tomorrow I'm running a 10 miler outside - my first outside long run in quite awhile because of the heat. But I think my Achilles needs to feel something different than a treadmill, so outside I'm running. I know it will be slower and hotter than I'm used to, but I'll be just fine. I plan to run before sunrise, will do two 5 mile loops so I can switch out my hydration at my house and have an icy towel handy to cool off with. I think it will be good to change things up.

School starts on Tuesday and my training group - Round Rock Fit - officially starts up on the 27th. I'm a coach again this year and I'm thrilled to be getting back to what I with some of the coolest people out there. And with training officially starting that means cooler temps are around the corner. After 65 triple digit days and dozens more above 90 degrees since April it seems hard to believe. But I have to grasp that hope or this heat really will make me absolutely insane. It's been AWFUL. It's really no fun to keep breaking heat records and now we've endured the hottest summer ever around here....EVER.  Freezing temp runs will never feel better and I can't wait!